"How can teenage girls improve their self-esteem in a Christian context, amidst an image-obsessed/impure society?"

Alina, one of our readers, wrote in and asked this question. I have a feeling there are a lot of us out here dealing with issues that are fed by our "image-obsessed/impure society"...can I get an AMEN?! Here's her full comment:

"Hi, my name is Alina and I'm 14 years old! I moved to a new state with my parents, after living in California all my life, in the summer of 2009. Especially since I'm new to high school in a new area, I am very quiet and constantly feel lonely.. My insecurities cause me to feel like people aren't interested in what I have to say. Low self-esteem has affected me for many years, but recently it has taken away my inner happiness. I just want to feel happy, beautiful, and confident on the inside so I can be somebody who makes a difference in the lives of others! I have a strong Christian foundation; I have heard of the term 'God-esteem' to raise your self-confidence, but it's been difficult for me lately to truly understand this wonderful concept.. How can teenage girls improve their self-esteem in a Christian context, amidst an image-obsessed/impure society? "

Did you guys know that you are bombarded with more images of beautiful women in one day than your great-grandmothers were in their whole lives? You're also surrounded by a ridiculous amount of mirrors, and a plethora of fashion and make-up options that previous generations never had to deal with. There are literally thousands of businesses out there that work hard to make you feel bad about how you look so that you'll buy their product. Think about it. If you don't feel inadequate in some way you probably won't keep buying more clothes, make-up, hair products, magazines (and on and on) in order to feel better about how you look or fit in. So how do you fight all these businesses with their big marketing departments designed to prey on your weaknesses? You go old school and stop playing their game.

If you think about this world like it's one giant battlefield and your life is one small but significant battle in the middle of an ongoing war, it helps you to see what's happening around you for what it really is. The devil is out to steal, kill and destroy, and a big way to get that done is to get us all so focused on ourselves and miserable that we're disqualified from the battle. If we're obsessed with ourselves it means we're not loving God with all we've got and definitely not loving our neighbor as ourselves. Most likely it means we're depressed and anxious and constantly comparing ourselves to the people around us, which just makes us more depressed and anxious and self-involved.

Here's how I think we stop playing the world's game and really win this battle. First, we recognize that we were created by a good, loving God who didn't need us but wanted us anyway. He made us the way we are, and put us here in this time and place for a reason. That means there is a purpose for my life beyond myself so I should probably stop spending so much time thinking about myself. It means I trust that I am very dear to God and that He knew what He was doing when He made me.

Second, we throw out those things in our lives that feed our self-focus and stop giving the devil so much freedom with our thoughts. We lay off the TV and magazines and internet sites that are doing way more harm than good and replace them with things that encourage and build us up. Start spending more time reading about Jesus' life and what He did with His time on this earth. He's the blueprint for how we're supposed to be living and He didn't worry about what He was going to eat or wear or how He looked. He just loved like crazy and poured Himself out on others as much as He possibly could.

Third, we try to start thinking of others as much as we do ourselves. There are 147 million orphans in this world, what can you do to help them out? There are elderly people stuck in nursing homes all over this country who are lonely and without hope. Can you visit them? Maybe take them some cookies? Maybe we stop treating shopping as a hobby and start going through our stuff and giving away what we don't really need to those who do need it. Get a friend involved and do something together, but work hard to think of others and pour your life out on them instead of wasting it thinking only about yourself. Hold each other accountable and see what God can do with someone whose heart is completely His. I heard a story once of a man who always bought two of everything. One for himself and one for someone else in need. That way he didn't blow his money on things he didn't really need and it was his way of loving others as much as he loved himself. Pretty cool idea.

This world lies to us on a daily basis and has only our destruction in mind. The truth is that we're beautiful in the eyes of the One who matters most and He created us with a purpose in mind. It's also true that the world doesn't care about us at all so why should we work so hard to live up to its messed up ideals? We are daughters of the King and are here fighting on the side of all that is good. Let's go out and live like it.