I feel distant from God, but I want to have a close relationship with Him. How can I change that?

You are not alone in feeling far from God at times. This is normal for a girl of ANY age But, I can tell you a couple of truths that will help you get through this time.

  1. God has not moved or changed. He still loves you dearly!! Get your mind around that, because it is true! The fact that you want to be close to God proves that His Holy Spirit is gently calling you to Him. That is also good news, because you can be sure He has not forgotten you. Also, don't ever think that your problems and concerns are too small for Him. He wants to know you and be closer to you than anyone on earth! So, smile, relax, and let the Holy Spirit speak to your heart. Get to a quiet place and talk to Him. Ask Him to speak to you and that you trust Him to let you know what He wants you to know. Then, expectantly wait and listen to your heart. You might even try sitting with a pad and pencil. Jot down anything you think as you meditate on Him. This is sometimes called "active listening" or "practicing the presence of God". It is incredible what can happen in these times. Now, God may not always speak to your heart in this way, because He has His own times and ways, but this is a good thing to get you focused on listening for Him. Also, I have asked the Lord before, first thing in the morning, just to somehow tap me on the shoulder spiritually during the day, to let me know He is there with me. Sometimes, I forget I have even prayed that, then something will gently tap me and my mind will register that I have just received the answer to my morning prayer! This is such a comfort to me. But, whether you do this or not, begin to read and maybe even memorize or write on a post it some verses that tell you the truth about God being never changing and always with you. Some you might want to look up: Isaiah 41:10; John 14: 1 and 14:18; Romans 8:35-39; Psalm 46:1; I Peter 5:6-7.

  2. You said that you feel distant from God. May I tell you something? Satan cannot stand up against the truth of the previous scriptures I have given you. But, he CAN and DOES use feelings to discourage God's people. Do not allow Satan to cause you sadness or discouragement with lies! I can guarantee you that your feelings are NOT to be trusted--not when they stack up against the truth of God's Word. And, God's Word clearly says that God loved you enough to send His Son to die for you and that He will never leave you or forsake you. God's Word says you are his dearly loved child, and He cares about you deeply and wants you to cast ALL your cares on Him! So, every time you feel far from God, recite these words of truth into your mind and say, "In faith, I believe God is near me, even when I cannot feel Him. I know He loves me and is near to me now." This will build up your faith muscles! Also, it may be that God allows these feelings in you to see if you will still believe in Him even when you feel alone. The Bible calls this a testing time, and it is designed to make you strong in your faith.

So, you should smile, relax, and know that God has not moved away. He loves you more than you can ever imagine!

Comments (7)


Whenever I go through a session like the one described, I have to remind myself that I'm in a love relationship with God. And just like a wife doesn't stop loving her husband when he leaves for work and she no longer sees him or feels him, she still loves him.
She doesn't go for a walk and see a new guy and think, "O! He's hot! I love him!" Haha, no! She has chosen to love God and commit to him through thick and thin!
So, just remember that this is a two way relationship. God doesn't stop pursuing you when you make yourself distant, and you shouldn't stop pursuing him when he seems distant;)


That was amazing! I have a lot of "crushes" on God...you know where you can't get enough of Him? And then when hard times hit it's like He's long gone. Then Christ showed me that I can never be faithful to Christ all by myself. I need His help through the work of the Holy Spirit to help me. Such as perserverance to have my quiet time EVERY day...which is soooo important.


Thanks guys this helped me alot!!:D


I am actually going through one of those times right now which is what brings me to this page. I have at times random "spurts" of joy and the feeling of being invencible, but they are all followed by longer periods of what seems to be an absence of God's presence in my life. Some times I turn and look at my self thinking maybe I have done something to push him away and am not sure if I will ever experience that closeness agian. But sometimes I am sure he is there and it is just a test of my faith. I just need some encouragment to stay positive. I very much so believe and trust in the Lord my God and know he loves me. I just can't get passed this feeling of guilt.

Rachel :

I have the EXACT same problem too Jaela! I will feel so close to God, but then I will feel just so far away. I want to feel close to him 24/7, but how?
I just keep drifting away!


yea,I've been feeling distant for a few years now,and spiritually I feel like I want to scream! I read God's word and pray and try to start the days off with a sacrificial heart to God,but I just feel so distand and discouraged,and a lot of times not good enough.I used to be sold out for God with so much zeal,excitemnt,and faith.How does that just go away,when I'm trying so hard to have faith and get myself back spiritully? I know I'm in this death valley feeling for a reason.Maybe God just wants me to come to the end of myself and rely fully on Him,then He can start to restore me,and build me up.but the time of confusion in really difficult to get through.


No need to worry God loves you and it is not reliant on how you feel but through faith. God's love is unconditional and totally pure and wholesome. No matter what you go through God will be their with you.

Many blessings

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