I remember when my friends and I were your age and we would sit around and analyze for hours what we thought some certain guy meant when he said such and such. Was he flirting? Did he like me? Is he going to ask me out? Should I call him? In these girl talk sessions each and every syllable the guy had uttered was dissected for further research and study. We almost always cracked the code of what the guy in question actually meant—or so we thought. If worse came to worse and we were still left without a clue by the end of our sessions, we resorted to the tried and true get-your-friend-to-ask-him method.
At the time, my friends and I had no idea that on the flipside, the guys were totally and completely clueless. Of course, we imagined that they also sat around and parsed through our words and flirtatious signals in a desperate attempt to crack the code of the female mind. In reality, nothing could be further from the truth. Imagine a guy calling one of his friends and saying, “After class, she said ‘maybe I’ll see you later.’ Do you think she said that because she wants to see me later or did she just say it like it was no big deal with the emphasis on maybe?” As a mother of a typical teenage son, I have been given a glimpse into the world of guys. He and his friends are cute, athletic, and fun to be around. In a nutshell, they are the kind of guys girls sit around and talk about.
So, what do guys do in their free time? Let me give you an idea. Recently, I was returning home after running a few errands. I pulled up in front of my house just in time to witness my sixteen-year-old son, Ryan, sailing down the hill of our driveway on a rolling office chair. Now, let me point out that this is not your average driveway. Our driveway is about one hundred twenty-five feet long and has a steep downhill slope from the top to the bottom. My son was picking up speed while grabbing the bottom of the chair and screaming for his life. His intended target was a skateboard ramp at the bottom of the driveway and beyond the ramp was a pile of cardboard boxes, no doubt to help cushion his fall. His friends stood by cheering him on as they awaited their turn. (You would sure think they would change their mind after watching Ryan.) As I watched my son travel down that driveway at rocket speed, launch off the ramp and crash into the boxes, I sat in my car dumbfounded. I was relieved to see him finally get up and limp back up the hill so he could, no doubt get in line and try it again. It was at that very moment that it hit me: All those years, while my friends and I sat around talking about guys—this was the kind of stupid stuff they were doing. Yes, these are our future leaders. Join me in a word of prayer.
Now don’t get me wrong—they talk about girls but it’s usually short and sweet. Just like when you talk to them on the phone—no drama, just the facts. I made a comment to my son a few days ago about one of his best friends going out with a certain girl. I had found out about the “new couple” from his friend’s mother when we went out for coffee. My son was totally clueless when I brought it up. He said something like, “Yeah, I guess that’s why I’ve been seeing them together at school a lot.” I replied by saying, “This is one of your best friends, don’t you guys talk about anything?” to which he replied, “Mom, we’re guys and guys don’t talk about stuff like that.” So there you have it. While you and your friends are sitting around trying to solve the latest cryptic guy puzzle, they are busy rolling down steep driveways on office chairs. And they say girls are more mature . . . imagine that.
Written by: Vicki Courtney, founder of Virtuous Reality Ministries and best-selling author of "Your Girl," "Your Boy," and the entire "TeenVirtue" and "Between" series.
Article taken from TeenVirtue: Real Issues, Real Life…A Teen Girl’s Survival Guide. Used with permission from Broadman and Holman Publishing.
Comments (22)
Hi my names Rachel! now i know exactly wut guys do! they never think about us! they r more worried whos turn is next in line to roll down the driveway in a rolly chair!!!
thnxs,
Rachel
Posted by Rachel | May 10, 2007 7:11 PM
Hah ha I'm gonna try that!! :D p.s. ask ya son if he's ever played spin the wheelie chair into the mud!! fun...honest
Posted by Celina | May 17, 2007 2:54 AM
Your rite. Hes cute.
Posted by XoxOsaraOxoX | May 17, 2007 2:58 AM
lol I had no dout thats wht guys do we have a bunch of guys like that in our youth group they r so funny me and friends talk about them for hours lol
Posted by ashlie | May 17, 2007 3:05 PM
no dout about it that is totally a guy thing we have some guys who r even crazier then he was lol and we talk about them a lot
Posted by ashlie | May 17, 2007 5:19 PM
that is very insightful. thanks. my bro isn't that crazy but then he is only in 6th. mabye it will come later. lol. sometimes guys are crazy but in a way that you just have to laugh at.
Posted by Lily | May 17, 2007 6:21 PM
wow....little scary!! haha..thanks so much for the insight. it really helped me see into a guys mind for once! my friends and i are always talking about stupid stuff guys say and stuff like that. i'll have to let them know about this!!
thanks!
em
Posted by Em | May 17, 2007 6:49 PM
no im a guy and trust me we talk about girls....maybe in ur sons case they dont.
Posted by kayne | May 17, 2007 7:42 PM
Thanks for writing that! My friends and I are always wondering if guys are ever thinking or talking about us girls, so this helps some. Especially since the guys in my school would totally do what your son did...lol
Posted by Brianna | May 22, 2007 6:06 PM
Im a guy and we kinda talk about girls, but you wouldent want to hear what some of the non christian guys say...
Posted by Dougie | May 22, 2007 11:42 PM
thats nothing. Did he ever ride a shopping trolley down a motorway turnoff? Now that is very stupid but very fun
Posted by pete | May 22, 2007 11:47 PM
Wow, these are the people we toss and turn over at night time. Pondering their everyword, and studying their facial expressions.
Posted by elle | May 28, 2007 11:17 AM
Guy's tottally talk about girls! I have some really good Christian guy friends and they've told me. I defenitly know they don't as much as we girls do. lol. but trust me, they think and talk about us.
Posted by Addie | June 4, 2007 6:56 PM
I love reading this stuff! I read "For Young Women Only" and I loved it!!! I'm so glad I'm not the only one who tries to be modest around here! (And that guys actually like it!)
Thanks a lot!
Emy Lou
Posted by Emy | June 12, 2007 10:23 AM
wwwwwooooooowwwww now i know lol. i mean i kinda had a clue but i didnt think that went for all guys!!!
Posted by breanna | June 23, 2007 6:13 PM
i totally know guys are nuts! my brother is absolutely nuts--he'd do that without thinking twice!!!!!!
Posted by Karis | June 28, 2007 2:55 PM
Lol that idea of riding down the drive way is pretty thrilling, i would want to try it.
Posted by Nadie | July 10, 2007 10:46 AM
Haha that sounds fun! Girls, dont get it wrong, guys just want to have fun. I mean come on, we girls do stuff that guys think are crazy with our girlfriends. And trust me, guys think and talk about girls! I have two older brothers, one is eighteen and the other one is twenty one. I personally like guys who can make you laugh by doing something crazy, its really cute. You dont have to spend hours trying to figure out what he meant, what he said is straight forward, so get out there and have some fun rather than wasting time trying to figure out what he meant cuz most likely he didnt mean what you might think he did after all your analyzing. Good luck sistas! :)
Posted by Nadie | July 10, 2007 11:02 AM
hahaha i told my best guyfriend about this article (they only heard the story o course) they spread word and a week later 3 of them tried this. it was hysterical.
Posted by shadow | December 10, 2007 7:18 PM
i wish guys would be more outgoing and talkative. most of the guys at my church are quiet and act like they're scared of girls or somethin. then if i go up to meet one of them, it comes off as bein flirty. grrr.
so if any dudes are readin this, PLEASE dont be afraid to come meet us, we wont think ur a weirdo, we'll really appreciate it ! <3
Posted by cutielove | March 3, 2008 6:13 PM
Haha that is so funny i was laughing my head off when i first read this
Posted by Sarah | June 3, 2008 9:47 PM
Now what was your son thinking? I was laughing my head off when I got finished reading this article. Your son is cute. I really enjoyed reading, thanks a lot for the good clean articles that you publish I really appreciate it.
Posted by Sami | June 11, 2008 4:36 PM